Religious discrimination in adoption


We’ve already seen that allowing gay couples to adopt is somehow religious discrimination. Guess what else is? Crazy-ass international regulations that keep a family who

–already has fourteen children (eight bio, six adopted)
–but has not registered itself as a foster care family
–because foster care families aren’t allowed that many children,

from adding number fifteen:

In order to adopt children from countries such as Uganda, India and the Philippines, parents must be licensed by the state as foster care families. That’s a problem for the Twietmeyers and other families who far exceed the standard licensing limit.

You already have more children than Uganda or America would let you have if they weren’t societal discards, but you’re doing Jesus’ work on earth, so you’re entitled to more? Fine, they’re just poor children, have more–but you can’t have this one because Uganda doesn’t do things that way, see? You could probably get a nice orphan from elsewhere to raise (in a closet or wherever you have space left over) while continuing to break the rules because you’re so very very very Good. But no, you want THIS orphan.

But social workers at the Twietmeyers’ adoption agency say they have been told the family won’t be licensed for more children, a necessary step to adopt from Uganda, where adoptions are not finalized until after children reach the U.S.

The conflict pits the families’ desire to live out their religious mission of caring for orphans against the state’s mission to protect children.

God bless the state. It just doesn’t understand how holy and important this family’s missions is. Screw child welfare! Screw their health! Screw the size of whatever structure they’re all living in! I want to rescue another orphan and that means I can!

“I feel like it’s all an act of God when we finish these adoptions because everything is a roadblock that we’re constantly trying to scale,” Carolyn Twietmeyer said. “This is no easy process. We shouldn’t have to go through what we need to go through to be a family. To climb the mountain of DCFS on top of church barriers and financial barriers is really unacceptable.”

And I feel like you want too much, and expect it too easily.
And I feel like if it had been easy for you to adopt, you’d’ve called that God’s will too.
And I feel that, in complaining you have to lift a single finger to adopt, you’re implying that you’re taking in worthless broken children nobody else would have as your Christian duty, that these kids are not worth the trouble if they can’t glorify you.
And I feel a great deal of hope that none of them ever read this interview.
And I feel that for you to pretend you suffer a damned thing by not having This Particular Orphan is shameless, egotistical drama. You’re cloaking your greed in the language used by people who have not been able to have or adopt any kids at all–the stuff we “go through to be a family”–when you have fourteen.

Fourteen, and you stamp your feet and cry Jesus. I hope the poor AIDS orphan does get a better home, but not yours. I think he’ll be better off where he can be the center of attention. He shouldn’t have to perform as yet another HIV-positive prop for Jesus’ glorification of your family, vying daily with fourteen other kids for attention and love (kinda like a small orphanage) while listening to Mom rant about how he should have been shipped over here for free.

Nobody’s picking on you, Mrs. Twietmeyer. It’s just that your days of getting exceptions made for you when you say “Jesus” may be coming to an end. You’ve become too outrageous in your expectations. Don’t they say God answers all our prayers, but that sometimes the answer is “no”?



Filed under Colonialism ROCKS!, Stop Saying That, WTF?!

9 responses to “Religious discrimination in adoption

  1. At one time I would have agreed with you. But I just met a family who raised their own 6 children and then decided to adopt kids that others consider ‘rejects’. So, they have adopted 12 children from broken adoptions, sibling groups, and handicapped from another country. I don’t think it is fluke the adopted children are all black. I think other people thought they just didn’t matter. Some people ARE able to adopt a large number of children and do good by them. Most aren’t; I know I couldn’t do what she does. She devotes her life to them while Dad works 50 hours a week. She homeschools and blogs about what they do as a family. These kids are THRIVING! BUT, you are right…this family needs some oversight.

  2. Elizabeth, I think we essentially do agree (?). I never said I didn’t think there are no “superfamilies” who can do this. I do think such families are rare, but I’m sure they exist.

    My gripe was with the temerity this woman shows–to whine and complain that adoption is haaaaarrrd when she already has fourteen children, and to complain that anyone who worries about the children and wants to put limits (or, as you said, “oversight”) on her family hates Jesus. That’s still some big stinky entitled bullshit right there.

  3. It’s also very using of adoptees to create salvation for the adopters.
    12 adopted children and they’re ‘all thriving’! I dare say they are with adequate food and if not why not? Go back for a look in 20 years time and if you can get the trust of the adoptees and interview them in depth and be assured they will tell you their true feelings and thoughts perhaps you’ll see a different picture.Why is it that people want to judge a situation in adoptionon by a small snapshot moment and believe it will be that way always?

  4. It’s a sad day when the dominant discourse (aka the KoolAid) has so infiltrated our minds that we just accept the fact that children should “fall through the cracks” and land in private institutions (this is not a home) such as this one. This is not an exceptional case to emulate, this is a damning indictment of a failed society and its inability to care for the disenfranchised and marginalized. To support this woman is to support racism, classism, and such marginalization as valid within the culture; a culture I am more and more thankful every day that I have left behind.

  5. Thanks for commenting, Daniel. You always hit the nail on the head.

    Am I the only one thinking this woman could have become an official foster family earlier if she’d wanted to, but decided at the time the government had no right to limit “her” family and chose not to do so? And now that that’s no longer convenient, she wants not only for her family to be the exception, but for there to be no rule at all? Cause that’s CRAZY.

  6. VHM

    Even their own church told them they were inappropriately trying to play Jesus.

  7. Hee hee hee. Remove the “e” and you have TWITmeyer. Hey this is Adopto-Snark, right?

  8. [giggle] Yeah, but I wasn’t gonna be the one to say it.

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